Just can't be... for a level 64 Elite item. This thing is awful. What am I missing?

You think it's awful? Looks pretty good to me. Lightweight so casters can wear. Mp regen. All resists. Mana and health. In any case, I can confirm these stats are correct.

what would you rather see on there Bsharp?

could use some Life Leech and Mana Leech imo, but otherwise it looks fairly legit.

Not every item is going to at or near "best in slot"... like some other games which will remain unnamed. Remember that there are a lot of talent builds and a lot of ways to play the game. I think that's part of what makes the game more fun. If there's anything I can't stand it's extremely formulaic item attributes. That is seen in most MMOs these days due to PvP balance issues, which I understand, but it also makes the loot incredibly boring. Just my values, I suppose.

For instance you might find a super great exceptional item that you really love, but find some elite items that you find to be disappointing. I think it depends a lot on what you value in an item, too, of course. I think if we asked around there'd be a fair amount of variety on that. A good example is your post that states that you value 2H weapons over 1H weapons. In my experience, I found that most players actually prefer 1-handers, so I was surprised by that statement—but I'm glad that you feel that way! In fact I put a fair amount of effort into paving the way for some builds that naturally lend toward favoring big 2H weapons. So I wanted that variety to exist.